By my calculations, and remember I majored in English because a Math whiz I was not, by the end of July, the Boston Red Sox should be fully staffed by the current Portland Seadogs’ roster.
The Bosox are, as the old saying goes, “dropping like flies.” And I don’t think there’s much that can top last weekend’s bedlam by the bay in San Francisco. On Friday night we watched as little bulldog Dustin Pedroia was felled by a foul ball off his paw, breaking it; on Saturday we witnessed Sox ace Clay Buchholz come up lame running to second base; and the trifecta came on Sunday as red hot Victor Martinez suffered a fractured thumb while twice being nicked by foul balls. It was like watching a “M*A*S*H” rerun.
The fact that the Red Sox are still very much in the post-season hunt is nothing short of New England Patriotesque. The Pats seemingly are always bitten by the injury bug, yet claw their way to the playoff picture.
Since the beginning of April, the Red Sox have had 13 players suffer significant injuries: Boof Bonser, Junichi Tazawa (out for the season, before it even began), J.D. Drew, Pedroia, Martinez, Buchholz, Mike Cameron, Dice-K, Josh Beckett, Jacoby Ellsbury, Jed Lowrie, Jeremy Hermida, and Mike Lowell.
Out of this baker’s dozen of wounded, two were placed on the 60-day disabled list and nine headed to the 15-day disabled list.
Yet, at press time, the Sox had scratched their way into second place in the American League East after a couple of months near the bottom, and were only two games behind the Yankees. And we have a one-game lead in the A.L. wildcard race.
So, back to my calculation theory, there have been major injuries to 13 players in 77 games. With 85 games remaining, we can therefore expect 14 more by season’s end.
Rumor has it that the Sox have chartered an Amtrak Acela Express from Pawtucket to Boston, and plans are in the works for one from Portland, Maine to Beantown. The beauty of having Seadogs report to the big club is that their ballpark is nearly identical to Fenway Park in its dimensions, including a Down East version of the Big Green Monster. Granted they’re not facing Major League pitching in the north country, but frankly there aren’t that many Major League pitchers in the Majors.
Watch out American League if this team ever gets all its ducks in a row.
As it stands now, we have to survive, at least through the All-Star break without top-notch players like Pedroia, Martinez, Lowell, Ellsbury, and Beckett.
Can we do it? Time will tell. But I’m not taking any chances. In my younger days, I could handle the leather pretty well at second base or shortstop, so I broke out the old mitt, lathered it up with petroleum jelly and gently massaged it back into something that remotely looks like leather.
I started taking some ground balls, but there’s a good-sized obstruction around my waist preventing me from easily scooping up the grass-huggers. After a few throws to first, I feel like I can tie my shoe without bending down, and my knee joints could stand a good lube job. Just a little out of shape. Yet, come late August I could be ready to help the Sox. By then they could be well through the Lowell Spinners’ roster.
Calling all ex-jocks — start getting into shape. We may have a World Series title to pursue come October.
Tito take note, relax, you’ll have a team to field no matter what.