By Kenneth J. Souza
Anchor Staff
FALL RIVER, Mass. — It’s not just roses and chocolate young lovers are buying in anticipation of February 14 these days — it’s also online subscriptions to Catholic dating websites.
Valentine’s Day always seems to be a catalyst to spur single people into action to seek out a potential soul mate. If Cupid’s arrow hasn’t found them yet, they figure, maybe it’s time to step onto the range and seek it out.
And with more than 22 million single Catholics in the country — a record number and many of whom are marrying at an older age — business is booming for Catholic online dating.
Thankfully, there are several reputable resources in cyberspace for Catholic singles. Websites like CatholicMatch.com, CatholicSingles.com and AveMariaSingles.com all provide a safe and reliable forum for like-minded Catholics to connect and, hopefully, find that special someone to share their lives and faith together.
“It’s not surprising that so many singles join our site this time of year,” said CatholicMatch.com co-founder Brian Barcaro. “They’ve just endured another holiday season alone and now they’re staring down the face of another date-less Valentine’s Day. That can be a painful one-two punch.”
Members of CatholicMatch.com said they are determined to take action this year. Asked in a recent online poll, “Which aspect of your life do you most want to improve in 2010?” 30 percent answered: “Be more proactive about meeting someone.” The second-most popular response, netting 24 percent of votes, was to lose weight, while 19 percent said they’re hoping to get finances in order.
Unlike secular dating websites such as Match.com and eHarmony.com, Catholic dating sites obviously cater to singles seeking out significant others who share similar belief systems and value the importance of the Catholic faith in their lives.
“I first joined CatholicMatch.com after a few relationships ended badly mainly because of our religious belief differences,” admitted Veronica Clark of Worcester. “Being an old-fashioned Catholic girl, finding a guy who was also an old-fashioned Catholic is very difficult to do at a bar or college party. I was shocked to find all the good-looking men in my area who were practicing Catholics, and immediately started talking to and meeting up with them.”
Clark’s perseverance paid off. Through CatholicMatch.com she ultimately met and is now engaged to John, with whom she will exchange vows June 27.
“We dated for nine months and I honestly knew within a month of dating that I would marry him,” Clark said. “Already having the difficult Catholic beliefs squared away, there wasn’t too much more that we didn’t already see eye-to-eye. I would have never met a more amazing man anywhere else.”
Anthony Buono, founder of AveMariaSingles.com, said his 11-year-old website was borne out of his own frustrations in initially not being able to find someone who shared his strict Catholic beliefs.
“It wasn’t an option for me to marry someone who didn’t share the depth of my faith,” Buono told The Anchor. “I did eventually meet someone and have been very, very happy. Then what happened is early in my marriage I continued to meet others who were in the same boat as I was. They were very frustrated. Ironically, there was a common denominator: the issue of contraception. There was an unbelievable amount of single people who had broken hearts from relationships with other Catholics. Things seemed to be going great and they invested their heart only to find out later that this other person wanted to put off having children.”
Joseph P. Hubert, a parishioner at Notre Dame Parish in Fall River, is a member of CatholicMatch.com and CatholicSingles.com and has had good luck in finding potential mates who share his beliefs. He said knowing the other person’s religious beliefs upfront takes the guessing out of the dating process.
“I used to go to the secular websites, but I had trouble finding people who were Catholic,” Hubert said. “I find that on the Catholic sites the people are more devoted to their faith. For me, I want everything to be just right. If I’m going to date someone, I try to be as upfront with them as much as possible.”
Joining a dating website can be intimidating for some, but these faith-filled singles believe it is not just a forward or forceful step, but also an important way to become proactive.
Waiting on God’s will and trusting in his timing doesn’t mean sitting on the sidelines. Today it means clicking into cyberspace and, hopefully, connecting with another single Catholic.
“All I promise if you join our site is that you won’t feel alone,” Buono said. “That hope goes a long way until the appointed time when God does bring someone into your life. That’s what AveMariaSingles.com is all about. You might meet somebody — and I hope you do — but one thing is for sure, you will have hope.”